After dispatching the Dalek bowling league, the five of us returned to the main doors of my TARDIS, treading VERY gingerly about Sabrae, due to her continued lack of coffee. When we stepped out of the giant, frosted mushroom my Time Travel Capsule had decided to imitate, and onto the surface of Bruce, we heard the now unique sound of Lestor's TARDIS.
At this time, I have to step away from the narrative and explain some things to any non-Gallifreyans reading this.
As I mentioned earlier, Lestor had a rather...obsessive fixation with acquiring new TTCs. There doesn't seem to be an end in sight to this particular obsession, either.
I have also mentioned that Gallifreyan TTCs (anything newer than a Type 25, anyway) possess telepathic circuits. This allows the TTC to interact with its Time Lord on an almost instinctual level about some things. On most types, this can include the Chameleon Circuit, though conscious control of that is nigh-impossible. The sub-conscious of the Time Lord can easily influence the form a TARDIS will take. If sufficient psychic energy is used, during the initial interface, the Chameleon Circuit can be set to a permanent state, which can, in extreme cases, effect not just the appearance of the exterior of a TARDIS, but also the sound of it's engines.
It is for this reason, I recommend against commencing the initial interface with your TTC's telepathic circuits while having sex in a stolen, 60s era London police box.
This is advice Lestor chose not to follow.
When his TARDIS materialized, it was in the physical form of said police box, with his name emblazoned across the top and an image of Kandy, stark naked, emblazoned on the sides. The door held a sign which read "Lestor's TITIS...BOOBIES!" on it.
The engines, rather than the characteristic sound TARDIS engines make, instead seemed to moan "Oh! Oh! OH GOD! RIGHT THERE!!!"
We all watched as the doors opened and Lestor exited, zipping his trousers, followed by Chandi, attempting, unsuccessfully, to fasten her brazier before it sling-shot off, ricocheting off the remains of Sabrae's unfortunate caffeine-withdrawl victim.
After a moment, Skippy spoke.
"Right, we've lost a bit of the plot here. We've gotten the Jupiter 2 thrown off course, but there is more to do if we are to stop Beiber's forthcoming tyranny.
"Lestor, you need to get Irwin out of The Madman's cupboard and take him with you to Los Angeles in 1983. You need to prevent the maiden voyage of the sub-orbital transport Spindrift from happening, or at least prevent it from arriving at its destination in London.
"Madman, you and sapphire need to travel to the Earth year 2223, to a planet on the other side of Mutter's Spiral called Vulcan. They favour logic over everything there. You're going to look for someone named Sarek. He's had some dealings with Terrans. Get him and bring him back to Earth in 2046. This is a point in Bieber's timeline where he is old enough to be convinced of his folly, but still not so old that he forgets to wear trousers.
"Tristan, you and I will be going to San Fransisco in 2006, for...planning sessions."
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